SECOND DECLARATION

Ever swat away a wasp only to have him pester you for the rest of yer picnic? For Me that wasp is the following question:

"Is Buff Striding a cult leader?"

I have been advised to deny this. Apparently the pejorative connotations are just too much for your delicate little identites to handle. My oh-so-clever board of advisors has suggested I use the following, more sanitary phrase:

I am a trans-personal religious control enthusiast... with an assertive, faith-based community outreach program.

There, that sounds better.